Always Somewhere

forestlodgetrail

A break, a chance to reset, pause and reflect amongst the peaceful hubbub of forest life, and in sharing this idyl with the boys and their energy, a chance to recharge and see through different eyes.

Early mornings, the rain falling through the trees and no-one else around I have the trail to myself, Lilly alongside, frantically running through the undergrowth, nose down, as if in a vain attempt to Hoover up every last scent  she only looks up every now and then, mouth open tongue hanging in a grin, exuding sheer delight and happiness. I am loving the warm rain and the narrow curving trail, almost happy.

The cabin break has been good for us all, and I’m grateful for the time away from life and all its many pressures, I have followed a list of ‘holiday rules’ which were set many years before: no shouting/raised voices (unless safety warning) no complaining (not even if a room is dirty on arrival) no arguing (hard one for the boys). It is very surprising how much a difference it makes to a holiday. It is a non-confrontational method of thought, to flow like water and to deliberately avoid triggering rage.

Once back into normal life the benefit of such peace is huge, and lasts quite a long time. Running and walking through the woods is a reminder that a little peace of that state of mind is available every time I run, and it has been very special to open the front door and be ‘in the woods’ as soon as my feet hit the ground.

I’m also looking at ways of running with a better camera, or an upgraded phone, the other night before we went on holiday I went out on the moor. it had been a clear blue sky all day, so I didn’t take my camera, I didn’t want to ‘lug’ it around if the sun was going to set in a clear sky.

moorsky

As you can see, nature blew me a raspberry and put on a show.

Bitch.

My head was not in the right space, full of my own woe, running is I’m told, the best thing for that, and as an added side effect I’m assured that I won’t be as fat. The forest cabin had a lot of mirrors and after seeing my reflection I’m filled with a depressive revulsion and sadness, I’m still in a dark place and I’m still fat, but I’m running again and the dark sky is brightening, hopefully my mind will follow.

Always somewhere
Miss you where I’ve been
I’ll be back to love you again

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s